A black man walks in to a 7 Eleven with a gun in his left pocket. He innocently walks over to the place where they keep all the hostess treats, and decides to purchase a pack of crumb donuts. The gun was purely for self defense, it was a bad neighborhood.

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Helena: Can u get me a pencil? Me: Sure. Me: Mr. Brandmeyer can u give me a pencil? Mr. Brandmeyer: Why? Me: I don't know. That's what Helena said.

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Why did the 16 year old black kid drop out of high school? He started a successful small business selling mixtapes.

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What did the Frog say to the other Frog? Nothing they can't speak

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A woman is walking down the street. A midget approaches her and with his keen sense of smell, informs the tall woman of her delicious scent and says, "Ma'am your hair smells lovely, may I please take a closer sniff?" Then woman obliges and the midget is arrested for alleged rape, or as he put it, trying to sniff her vagina.

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Why did the Indian cross the road? Trail of Tears.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To buy more crystal meth to fuel his addiction while his wife and children starved in the public houses.

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What did the baby say to the man? Babies can't talk ,the baby did not say anythingto the man!

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what's longer than my shlong? .... nothing

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Why did the first squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure. Why did Bobby fall off his bike? He was hit by 4 squirrels.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

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Yo mommas so fat We are terribly concerned about her health

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what did the hobo as the other hobo? do u have any cheese?

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Why did the woman make so many sandwiches? She was a mother catering for her child's sporting event.

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What was big and stiff A 30cm ruler

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God saw himself. Finally, proof.

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Justin Bieber walked into a strip club. Selena Gomez wasn't there.

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A man walks into a bar his alcoholism is tearing his family apart

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What did the Rasta man say when he got his dread stuckin the toilet ?

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What do u call a muslim A infection to America

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What is Obamas favorite book? I don't know, ask him.

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

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The word "Walter" is never funny.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have to go to the bathroom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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