what did the alcholic get his children for christman, nothing i lied about the children. Another joke by rangler thumbs up for more.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks what he'd like. The man says something funny, but you kinda had to be there.

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Duke Nukem censored line: What are you waiting for? the celebration of the day you crucified Jesus and ate his flesh and blamed it upon the anti christ because of... Victory? Because you know Jesus gave his life in order to prove that he was immortal and died for your sins because his life is eternal... Satan your Moral Man: Nah, lets just go with "what are you waiting for, christmas?" Now go celebrate you murdering your savior which said "ill be back" on the cross and returned three days later at his second coming? Seriously? I thought only Jesus: The guy that was totally an ARAB (deny it and be consumed in the flames of hell, not my problem), and Jesus: strikes back came out, where can I get Jesus: The third coming? Factoid: Yeah Jesus was totally a blonde haired white man which went clothed in the finest ARYAN silks, in addition he only drove in his MUSTANG 9001 and smoked Lucky Strike... Which did nothing for his luck...

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Q: What did Peter say after a long day of work when he got home? A: Nothing, in fact he has job, home, family, or anyone to help him. His leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

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What is brown and lives in a toilet? A black homeless man

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What did the Chinese man say to the black man? I'm Part of my Asian herritage.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Jon "Bones" Jones will be fighting Rashad Evans for the Light Heavyweight title tonight at 10PM Eastern time at UFC145.

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How did the fat guy survive the air crash? He was he was astronomically and improbably lucky.

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Bob: Oh, there was a big surfing competition in Hawaii. Bill: that's really cool. Bob: yeah, there were huge waves up to 53 feet. Bill: Awesome! Bob: Yeah there was a Japanese guy that won. Bill: Wow, that will bring up the spirits of japan. Bob: Yeah, but he got disqualified. Bill: No, how?!?! Bob: he was surfing on his dresser.

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im passing this on from a friend: 2 blondes walk into a building, you think one woulda saw it,

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have the Cadillac, Get the Guns

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Roses are red violets are blue What the heck do flowers Have to do with You?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like funny jokes but I tend to ruin the punchline by just talking too much and that's probably why no one likes me and...

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Poop...

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What dithe blackman say to the white man ???? Nothin! They both committed suicide.

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Why couldn't the girl eat her pizza? She had no face.

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Knock knock? Who's there? You have cancer.

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What did the Liver say to the Heart? Nothing, Organs can't talk

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What did the fish say after he swam into a wall? Dam

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Life gives you lemons you make lemonade. What do you do when life gives you melons... youre skrewed.

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What did the catholic priest do to the little boy in the Confessions Took his confessions

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Kittens are orange, puppies are grey, and they both make good pets

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Why did the woman call 911? Fire.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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