Knock Knock! Who's there? Smell mop. Smell mop who. *giggle*

"Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's parents?" "No" "Neither has he"

women's rights

An obese man walked into McDonalds and ordered 6 Big Macs. He proceeded to walk to a booth in the back corner and eat them all. Turns out he was white.

What colour is an orange? Orange. What did you expect?

Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

Lol, she does not think anything, she knows. Its not unfaithfulness if you ask for permission and are granted so because the trust is strong and mutual.

What do you call it one an Arab and a Jew get married? Love.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Nothing, shit went down so bad.

i threw my line in the toilet the fishing was pretty shity that day

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah...

A man was mowing the lawn. The mower stops, so he look to see if something stuck in the blades. What did he pull out? Nothing, the gas ran out.

Justin Bieber walks into a bar. He is soon kicked out as he is underage.

What the the Tyrannosaurus say to the chicken? Dinosaurs are extinct and even if they were not, it would not say anything to a domestic fowl, it would most likely devour it with one bite.

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

Why did the chicken cross the roard? There were no cars in the immediate vacinity and the chicken therefore came to a logical conclusion that it was a rational theorem on which crossing the road could be based.

A Jewish boy walks up to his father and says: Dad, can I borrow 50 dollars? The dad responds: 40 dollars?!? What are you going to do with 30 dollars?!?

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Want to hear an urban legend? There's a straight feminist.

Q: whats white and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you A:a fridge

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Extremely vulnerable to predacious animals such as Brown Bears and Grey Herons

why was the tricycle lonely? the mom back over the kid in the driveway.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a murderer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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