- Anti Joke

I told a priest that I would never believe in anything greater than myself. He said I had the God complex, that I was grandios. I stared him in the eye and asked, "how highly do you think of me? Thank you" and left.

-2

Whats better then free candy from a guy in a van? Trying to find his lost puppy so his kids don't cry.

-2

Was in a coma, survived trough smoke and mirrors, and I had 3 separated sections of my order in order to test the efficiency of my words, united we are about 6.800.000 people. Excuse my anger below, I mean I was in a coma and ended up on some hard painkillers, and while I am still tapering down on a "totally medicinally safe" dosage of 20 mg valium its a bitch, even for a guy that enjoys a mild painkiller every now and then in order to focus. Excuse my excessive typing, its paincontrol vs the stress and all 64 side effects of valium. I am alive, and my followers know that, I do not mean to brag, but Neronism tends to end up fucked up when I am gone with people trying to live up to what only I can do apparently, so I decided it was time to mash the separate groups together... Btw, we live at point zero now, if you do not know where that is, I can inform you at later time. But be quick about it if you have more questions, we only chat on horsehead due the "discussed hours"

-2

A Black man, a Latino, and a Midget get into a car. They drive to the county fair, get snow cones and ride the tilt-a-whirl.

-2

Ed has spent all his days on the farm. It was the farm of his father and grandfather before him; long have they prospered from the fruits of this land. He has a wife and 3 beautiful children, all of whom live happily on the farm. Ed still manages to keep an active social life, and has lots of interesting friends. His best friend is Moe. As a young man, Ed had spent a few years living in the city for his studies. Moe lives in the city, and he knows Ed from College. One day, Moe came out to the farm to have lunch with his old friend. After lunch, he and Ed took a walk around the farm. They passed by the horses, the chickens, the pigs and finally they came to the cows. Ed looked at Moe, and he saw that he was focused intently on a single cow. "What's the matter, Moe?" he asked. "That," Moe said, "is one skinny cow."

-2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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Equal rights!

What Did The Farmer Say When He Lost His Tractor.... "Wheres My Tractor"

Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Yes, are you on a horse? No. Oh...

What did the guy say when he died? nothing, he was dead

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm going to murder you Did you look behind you?

You are so down to earth, and never confuse that with "simple minded".

What do a duck and a tricycle have in common? They both have wheels. Except for the duck.

The Tiarajudens is a Permian land-walrus.

Why couldn't Jimmy wash his hair? He has leukemia and therefore no longer has hair.

Roses are red Violets are blue If you are reading this Then it must be deja vu

What did the Dad say when his daughter murdered everyone Tea you're grounded

What do you call a smart phone that doesn't want to work? The first conscious phone ever

A panhandler came up to me today and said he hadn't had a bite in weeks, so I gave him some change.

So I saw my asian friend at the beach on a really sunny day, so I said hi.

Knock Knock! Who's there? I have a gun. Get in the car.

I told a priest that I would never believe in anything greater than myself. He said I had the God complex, that I was grandios. I stared him in the eye and asked, "how highly do you think of me? Thank you" and left.

Whats better then free candy from a guy in a van? Trying to find his lost puppy so his kids don't cry.

Yo mama's so fat, that when she jumped, gravity pushed her back to the floor!

they're dead. idiot.

Q: What did the mute kid say to his mother ?

What is white and fluffy? A cotton ball.

A Black man, a Latino, and a Midget get into a car. They drive to the county fair, get snow cones and ride the tilt-a-whirl.

Anti Joke

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