Knock Knock Who's there? The Gestapo

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What did the bank teller say to Santa Claus? May I help you?

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Q. Why did my ass feel so sweaty? A. Because i was exercising and suckn on some nips.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

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Knock knock Who's there A gorilla A gorilla who? A gorilla is a ground-dwelling, predominantly herbivorous ape that inhabit the forests of central Africa. The eponymous genus Gorilla is divided into two species: the eastern gorillas and the western gorillas, and either four or five subspecies. They are the largest living primates by physical size. The DNA of gorillas is highly similar to that of humans, from 95–99% depending on what is counted, and they are the next closest living relatives to humans after the chimpanzees and bonobos.

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A man walks into a bar and says, "I'll take a drink."

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What's been hit millions of times? A woman married to an abusive husband.

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Why was Susie's mom crying? Because Susie got hit by a bus

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How did my grandparents survive the Holocaust? Well for starters, it helps that they weren't Jewish, they didn't live in Europe, and quite frankly, they probably would have supported Hitler because they were right wing pricks.

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A bartender walks into a bar. About 8 hours later, he goes home.

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Q. How many blonds do you know? A. I don't know any blonds, but are you perhaps talking about blondes? Because if so, I still don't know any.

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Why did the astronaut die in space? Just kidding there was no astronaut. It was a cucumber

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A man said to a performer performin in a concert,"Go break a leg!". The performer did not respond because he is perfoming.

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Nancy Kerrigan walks into a club

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Why was 10 afraid of 9? Because 9-8-7-6-5-4-3-2-1...Kaboom!

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there once was a man from Nantucket. I want to ride in a helicopter.

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Why cant white guys jump? Well that would be wrong because some can. Have you seen Blake Griffen?

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69

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color blind person solves a rubix cube just kidding thier color blind

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Q. What did the boy do for his birthday? A. Nothing. His birthday occurred on 9-11.

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whats long, hard, and full of semen? A submarine

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What did Goldilocks say to the Three Bears? No one knows. Her remains were discovered three weeks later.

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I used to be an adventurer, but then I decided to retire.

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In a galaxy far, far, away.... There were quasars, stars, and various sized meteors.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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