A man walks in to a bar, wakes up the next morning with the news that they have found a cancerous tumor in his neck.

What did the biscuit say when he saw his friend get run over? Oh my god. Dave, are you ok? Somebody call an ambulance.

What is the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer while the other is just a water melon.

Two cats are sat on a window ledge. One cat looks to the other and says "Meoww".

Roommate 1: I want to make food but I'm not going to Roommate 2: Why not? Roommate 1: Because I'm tired and lazy.

89 bottles of beer on the wall, 89 bottles of beer, if one alcoholic passes the wall, 0 bottles of beer on the wall!

If Abraham Lincoln were alive today, he'd be really really old.

u are so............................................................................................................................................................................................gay

Whoever is reading this, I love you and I hope you have a great day.

What's worse than being single on Valentine's Day? Finding out your son has AIDS.

My dog got out of it's cage. So I found it and be the shit out of

Parents were talking about a particular whore house and tries to keep it secret to their son. Father: Bob and I saw the house near the river, its a whore house full of prostitutes. Mother: Shhh! Our son is listening. The Son enters the room. Son: Don't mind me, I know that area. Both parents were angry: So you've been there!? Don't deny, you know! Son: Just because I know doesn't mean I've been there. I know the moon has less gravity but I haven't been there.

Q: How do you starve a Black family? A: By not giving any Food.

Why did the pirate get kicked out of the pirate movie? He killed 7 people while looking for treasure under the seats.

How did the lazy fat boy burn a lot of calories? He set his fat friend of fire.

What do you call a women with 2 black eyes? Hopefully nothing because abuse is something that shouldn't be messed with and it is wrong.

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

When is a door not a door? When your house burns down.

Help! I've fallen and I can't get up.

Johny wanted a pogo stick for his birthday. Johny's mom got him a pogo stick for his birthday. The day of Johny's birthday, he fell off the pogo stick and broke his arm.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Jews are human beings. Pizza is a type of food.

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because it broke...

Why was the student late for class? Because paraplegics can't drive.

Freddie Mercury died of AIDS. Many consider him a musical hero.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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