Why did Aodhan not come into school? He was sick.

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whats worse than getting a fail on your math test? Getting shot.

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what is the difference of left and right? i used my right hand to stab your mother.

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When life hands you lemons hand them back because you don't like lemons

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A girl walks into a bar. She unfortunately meets a man with a drinking problem. The man takes her home, strips her of her virginity and then beats her with a bat until she can no longer breathe. Her name was Laura Pratz.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is created to be used by multiple people for sitting down or other forms of rest, and does not have consciousness or the complex body systems of humans and other animals.

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Two cannibals are eating around a fire in the jungle, and one turns to the other and says "Does this taste funny to you?" Oh yeah, and they're eating a clown.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sargeant John Smith mam. I regret to inform you that your husband died in the line of fire - I'm sorry.

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i like pie

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A man walks into a bar... But, it's not funny because he's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

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I'm gonna put my nut-sack on your drum set

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Why did the Booger cross the road? because He was getting picked on....

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what looks like a banana, smells like like a banana, but isn't a banana? a fake banana

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why did the chicken cross the road? to vote off obama

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Knock, Knock Who's there? The IRS, you're being audited.

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A Priest and a Rabbi walk into a grocery store. As they walk past the meat section, the Priest stops, smiles, and turns to the Rabbi. "Feeling Hungry?" The Rabbi reaches down and picks up a pack of Koscher hotdogs.

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What is black and white and red all over? A half eaten zebra carcass.

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What did the Nazi call the Jew? Alex.

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I'm so popular... That I am friends with many people...

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Want to hear a good joke? The NBA.

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I have a knock knock joke. You start.

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I scream. You scream. We all scream and huddle in a corner of our first grade classroom because of a masked gunman.

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How long does it take to cook a baby in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy jacking off.

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? As Suzy neared the ground while swinging, her foot caught a small hole in the swingset's pebble foundation, and the power of Suzy's momentum along with the sudden stop of Suzy's swing forced Suzy to fly forward off of the swing. Suzy, seeing the silliness of her mistake, laughed it off, and tried to get back up. She quickly realized that her leg had snapped in half. Suzy will never walk again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops