Do you know what's funny about the holocaust? Nothing, it was an unspeakably evil act by a deranged man who should never have been given the power to command a nation

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All work and no play makes Johnny successful in his field of interest.

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whats the difference between valium and m & ms ? one is,nt a tasty little chocolate

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3 out of 4 questions. The lion king was holding a meeting and every animal was there except for one. What animal wasn't there? The elephant. It was still in the fridge.

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extraction interveal means the opposite of integer

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Whats red and is bad for your teeth? A brick.

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why did the giraffe cross the road? because my dad and his "fishing buddies" are having another "meeting" in the basement. I hear weird noises, and I haven't seen my little sister in weeks, since the last "meeting." Dad said she went to a special camp for little girls. I hear horrible noises.

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why did obama become president? people voted 4 him.

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what did the penguin say to the dodo bird. nothing because dodo birds have bin extinct for thousands of years and it is highly unlikely for a dodo bird to be saying anything to a penguin do to the fact they wouldn't be anywhere near each other and neither species can speak.

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Whats yellow and shaped like a banana? Bananas

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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Where did little Annie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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Whats skinny, round, tall, smells like a dead baby, hard, small, and fat? nothing

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what happened to the boy who asked for a hit from the bong? he got punched in the face.

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How many midgets can you fit into a telephone booth? Well, it really depends on a lot of factors. The size and design of the phone booth itself is pretty important. Also, midgets really have a wide range of sizes, but we could do some analysis and find out the average at least. Based on that we could have an estimate done soon.

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What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? It doesn't matter. You can call him anything you like, but he won't come running to you.

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What happens when you throw a red rock in a green pond? It sinks.

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Did you hear about the one with the priest, the boy, and the dildo? Yes, sadly I have.

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What did one platypus say to the other? Whatever noise platypuses make. I'm not sure. I am sure that they lay eggs though.

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A baby seal walks into a bar. Animal services are called and the seal is returned to its natural habitat. A man then beats it dead with a blunt object.

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Hey, you have small hands.

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What did one retarded person say to another? asiuasdhfiusanklasndfkjlnknankjas

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What did God say to the Priest? Nothing, there is no God

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You're mama's so fat: she has to wear plus size clothing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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