how much wood could a wood chuck chuck? 3

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Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the slaughter house

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What is E.T. short for? He has small legs

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why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken

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What’s green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

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A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar man asks ''what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk

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knock knock who's there? Tommy Tommy who? Tommy Smith from across the street, i just ran over your dog.

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Why couldn't Prince William go to the party? Because his WIFE bought tickets to the f**cking ballet.

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Poop.

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what is white and red all over? a ginger

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What is green and sticky and oozes up a kid's upper lip? A homesick booger.

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This is a joke for Homeless people:

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Where did John go? Refrigerator

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Q: what do you call a phone that's fake? A: a phony...

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What did the priest say to the child.... nothing he just gripped his arm tightly and pulled down his pant

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Why can't Michael Jackson drive? Because he's dead.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: Nobody cares because its a chicken

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how do you make a janeter cry, you shit on the floor

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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What looks like dirt, smells like dirt, but isn't dirt? Fake dirt!!

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A Squirrel jumps into a bar, lands on one of the empty tables and begins eating the Peanuts out of a bowl. The bartender thinks to himself "I really should close that window to keep the Squirrels out..."

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Why couldn't Spiderman pay his rent? He didn't have enough money.

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Welcome to Watchmojo dot com and today we'll be talking about the Top 10 numbers from 1 through 10. In this episode we will be discussing which numbers from 1 to 10 gain popularity and mainstream appeal amongst people from all over the world. Number 10. 10 (Ten) Number 9. 6 (Six) Number 8. 8 (Eight) Number 7. 4 (Four) Number 6. 5 (Five) Number 5. 3 (Three) Number 4. 2 (Two) Number 3. 9 (Nine) Number 2. 7 (Seven) Here are some honorable mentions: 3.14 9.9 1 and a half Number 1. 1 (One)

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Why was the black guy good at basketball? He practiced hard everyday.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops