What's black and blue and red all over? A person who was just in a fight.

roses red violets blue my name chad i stupid

Why did hitler kill all the Jews? He is racist

Why coulden't the fish swim? He got poked in the eye with my nipple. My nipples get really big when I'm swimming in cold water.

why couldnt hellen keller drive? cuz she was blind

what does a jew want most for hanukkah? presents

Two black guys walk into a country club and ask to play a round of golf. They are turned away because the aren't members of the club.

Why did the boy cry? Because he was mercilessly beaten by his mother.

what has legs but can't walk? a paraplegic

I Hear Boston Is having a blast.

Why did the murderer buy a lizard? He thought that they were cute.

What is the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A Mexican is a human being of Aztec descent, while a bench is an inanimate object used most frequently as a place to sit.

hi

yo mama so fat that she should be concerned because diabetes is a serious issue

What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

Why did the man scream? He got his dick caught. In the zipper.

What happens when you put an embryo in a blender? I don't know, I was too busy jerking off.

Why did the tree fall? I cut it.

What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods They both have beards... EXCEPT FOR TIGER WOODS.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS. AIDS is worse.

A man walks into a bar and says: "ouch!"

A guy walks into a bar, he has a few drinks than leaves.

What's the difference between mw2 and mw3? Nothing

A nun, a jew, and a KKK member are all stuck together in a lifeboat. A large wave overturns the boat and they all drown.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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