How do you kill a blonde? Repeatedly stab a knife into her jugular vein

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A boy dares his friend to jump off the walking bridge. The boy's friend accepts the dare and jumps. What happens next? The boy brain is splattered on the ground.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was in a refrigerated freight truck en-route to its destination.

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What's worse than pushing a baby off a cliff?........ Standing at the bottom with a pitchfork....!

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What did the man do after a bad day at work? He went home and beat his wife

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Why didn't Hellen Keller just wear glasses? Oh wait

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How many fairies does it take to screw in a light bulb? If you still believe in fairies, there's something wrong with you.

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I saw a kid watching Harry Potter so I asked him "Do you like Harry Potter?" he replued "yeah" so I asked "do you want to be Harry Potter" he said "yeah"... ...so I killed his parents and locked him in a cupboard.

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A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

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Why was the boy confused? Because somebody had been running around in circles around him and throwing plastic cups at his face.

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MWAAHHHHHAHAHHAH

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What do you call a Muslim driving a plane? You don't drive a plane.

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A racist indian (from india) walks into a bar (in india). A catholic priest walks into the same bar. The bar says 'moo'. The bar is a shape-shifting cow.

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Do you know what really makes me smile? Facial Muscles.

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What do you call a Mexican named Chicee? Chicee

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I like boys!!!!! CC

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Magic Johnson has AIDS

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman gets off the bus and files a complaint with the public transit system and the driver loses his job.

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clamidia

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What makes the antijokes on this site funny? Nothing.

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Your momma's so fat that when she goes to the beach, she feels self-conscious in front of all the other beach-goers.

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What do you get when you cross a rhino and an elephant? Two angry pachyderms.

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I have a knock knock joke. You start.

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What is obama's favorite place to eat? Subway

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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