A family has been forced out of their house by ghosts. Who are they gonna call?... Their insurance company.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Roses are red violets are blue, he is for me and not for you, he's too ugly you can have him

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joe diragi whacks off his dog

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What do you call a bunch of white people walking down a cliff? Avalanche

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what do a pizza and a jew have in common? they both burn in an oven

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How many holes can you poke in my chest, When my chest is by far the best If you believe you can stab Then then grab a knife...that you can grab Skewer my breast Which lies on the best chest And you will discover A man under your covers Yes, keep on pokin' Poke my chest with the knife you are strokin' And then swallow a chode because you are stupid.

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Yo mama is so fat, she just had a heart-attack.

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A couple of years back a went to chile for a day, I was then trapped underground for 70 days...

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What has 4 eyes and cant see? Mississippi

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Guest what in the butt

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What did Helen Keller say to the little boy with cancer? Hudd Wahher shelper, ghh o.

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This week only, 2 for 1 misdemeanor shop lifting arrest. How can I do it? Because I can.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know chickens are absent minded creatures that can aimlessly walk around.

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How do you stop someone from getting cancer? Kill them.

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You are pretty bad emulations, first of all you should all swear and cuss a lot, that way you never get green thumbs and you all get minimal attention (negative attention) from people whose messages do not concern. I mean come on, if you are all different, you gotta admit that you are all good at typing like the very same person, its just that, none of them are good at sounding as the guy they are trying to emulate.

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Yo momma so fat, the last time she saw 90210 was on the scale!

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I heard that you could burn punds so I found a fat kid and set him on fire

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Why couldn't Stephen Hawking run a marathon? He was struck by a very serious disease, otherwise known as refrigerator to the face, at the age of 5.

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the blue man livedin the blue house the black man in the black house the white man in the white house but who lived in the white house ,not the white man barack obama

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A jellyfish walks into a bar, the bar doesnt appreciate him, so he retreats back to his jellyfish lands.

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Q: Why does a zebra have stripes? A: Because Sarah Jessica Parker is a horse.

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Q: How did Helen Keller cross the street? A: She walked.

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How do you get 100 Jews into a car? You can't. It's physically impossible.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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