Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

You're on fire.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is created to be used by multiple people for sitting down or other forms of rest, and does not have consciousness or the complex body systems of humans and other animals.

KNOCK KNOCK. who's there? Isdar Isdar who? Isdark in here.

"I see London; I see France..." "Wow. You must have exceptional eyesight."

11111

A horse walks into a bar... Horses are not indigenous to China.

Why was the little girl lying on the floor? Because she had no arms or legs.

What's pink and fluffy? PINK FLUFF! What's blue and fluffy? BLUE FLUFF HOLDING ITS BREATH!

What do you get if you put a black man in the blender and then in the microwave ? ... I don't know, that's why I'm asking.

How many hispanics does it take to screw in a light bulb. One. Just one. You just screw it in, it's not that complicated.

How did the square become a circle? Due to the period of recession in our nation, it was found necessary to cut corners.

Goats are like mushrooms. If you shoot a duck, I'm afraid of toasters.

why did the chef go to jail? because he was caught beating an egg

How does one propagate a humorous reaction from peers and associates while not utilizing such characteristics as whit, jocularity, substance or auspicious punch lines? That's what she said.

What do you say to a man who just gave you a million dollars. thank you

what do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Bob

Q: Why cant dinosaurs talk A: Because they are dead.

Never again, I have all the intel I need on you, you cost me a fucking eye, you think I would let go of that so easily? It hurts day and night, I have not slept in days, my fucking eyelid is torn right off, and while I use a fucking excuse for an eyepatch, I still have not gotten used to sleep without being able to shut both my eyes, I have a constant fever, you miss me, you are directly responsible for scaring my wife and fucking over my face. Deal with it, cry harder asshole. Moral: You step on my foot, I break off yours, you cost me an eye, you do not know whats waiting in line for you, I am going to make you beg me to let you die! Did you think I would warm up as quickly to something as irresponsible as you? And we do not know yet if you did this on purpose, we do not even live in the same fucking country, and I get assholes assaulting me again! What the hell have you done? If my wife had been here I would have been dead! Moral: I hope you got pets, I will skin them alive in front of your face!

women sitting on a bench quietly. they have no ability to speak.

a 12 year eld Maxican girl is aksed to spell the werd newmonia she gets it rite and wins the spalling beef which makes me sad bcuz English is my forst langage and i still dont get it and im 25

A frog found a smoking cigarette on the road, so he/she takes it, smokes it, and explodes.

what does a gorilla do when it sleeps. it snores.

What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? One's a black man and one's a pizza.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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