Why did the student fall asleep during class? He was very tried from staying up too late.

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What do stuffed animals and living animals have in common? There both living except the stuffed animal.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't make for a very good accountant.

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What looks like poop and smells like cheese??

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Amblyopsidae, or blindfish, commonly found in caves where they are well adapted to life in the dark.

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Want to hear a good joke? The NBA.

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I'm so popular... That I am friends with many people...

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One of them you crack open with a sledgehammer and feast upon, and the other is a dead baby.

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how do u get a clown to stop smiling? Hit it with an axe!

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Why are atheists stupid? Actually, statistically, they are more intelligent than believers.

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There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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i think i have a problem with these jokes they aren't finny

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I scream. You scream. We all scream and huddle in a corner of our first grade classroom because of a masked gunman.

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Want to hear a joke about Potassium? So do I.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? The chicken decided go get cigarettes and then hang out at a bar. The chicken sitts next to horse, the horse says "Why the sad face?" The chicken justs sitts there, thinking about the insanity that he has caused. "I don't know, is my joke not getting old?" Replied the chicken.

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On a scale of one to 10, F*ck yourself.

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What’s green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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How did the little boy survive war? He respawned at his teams side of the map

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Why was the man unable to get an erection? Because he was a woman

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give my joke a thumbs up Please!!!

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How do you kill Michael Jackson? You don't he is dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops