anti-joke teehee

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A kid walks into a shop and asks the shopkeeper for a loaf of bread. The shopkeeper says, "White, wholemeal or multigrain?". The kid replies, "No thanks. My bike's outside".

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What's orange and rhymes with parrot? Carrot

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extraction interveal means the opposite of integer

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead.

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What happened to the guy who ate the alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He died

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Knock Knock Who's there? Donald Trump Donald Trump who? I already told you my full name. You're fired!

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A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

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what did the pregnant mexiCAN woMAN say while she was giving birth? A LOT of curse words

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Why did the milkman wear a white belt? To keep his pants up.

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What happens if Pinocchio says "My nose is about to grow." Nothing, Pinocchio was a fictional character created by Walt Disney.

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What is bright yellow and tastes like Gatorade? Antifreeze

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident, your entire family is dead.

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BUT HWY?

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Actually it couldn't even walk because of all the hormones they injected into it in order to genetically enhance it's size and flavor.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have to go to the bathroom...

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Your mother is so fat.

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whats worse then falling on the ice? -getting raped by a blue whale

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What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

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Roses are gray, violets are gray, everything's gray, bitch im a dog.

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Why did the boy only have one arm? tigers make terrible pets

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Why did the black man fall asleep? because he was tired.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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