whats worse than getting a fail on your math test? Getting shot.

what is the difference of left and right? i used my right hand to stab your mother.

I know a lady who is SOOO fat that when she steps into the ocean, she gets her toes wet!

When life hands you lemons hand them back because you don't like lemons

A girl walks into a bar. She unfortunately meets a man with a drinking problem. The man takes her home, strips her of her virginity and then beats her with a bat until she can no longer breathe. Her name was Laura Pratz.

Two cannibals are eating around a fire in the jungle, and one turns to the other and says "Does this taste funny to you?" Oh yeah, and they're eating a clown.

Knock Knock Who's there? Sargeant John Smith mam. I regret to inform you that your husband died in the line of fire - I'm sorry.

A man walks into a bar... But, it's not funny because he's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

My wife has terminal cancer.

I'm gonna put my nut-sack on your drum set

Why did the Booger cross the road? because He was getting picked on....

Q. Whats the difference between watermelons and people? A. Watermelons don't smoke pot...

What's funner than a barrel of monkeys ? Not the Holocaust .

why did the chicken cross the road? to vote off obama

Knock, Knock Who's there? The IRS, you're being audited.

A Priest and a Rabbi walk into a grocery store. As they walk past the meat section, the Priest stops, smiles, and turns to the Rabbi. "Feeling Hungry?" The Rabbi reaches down and picks up a pack of Koscher hotdogs.

What is black and white and red all over? A half eaten zebra carcass.

I have a knock knock joke. You start.

What happened to Kim when she went swimming? She didn't, she doesn't know how to swim.

I scream. You scream. We all scream and huddle in a corner of our first grade classroom because of a masked gunman.

How long does it take to cook a baby in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy jacking off.

Thomas Hobbes had a good life Actually he was born prematurely which caused his mother to die, and his alcohallic father left him at a young age to an abusive older brother sucks to suck Hobbes, at least you were smart

what did the mexican firefighter name his two sons. Ryan and Mike.......

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? As Suzy neared the ground while swinging, her foot caught a small hole in the swingset's pebble foundation, and the power of Suzy's momentum along with the sudden stop of Suzy's swing forced Suzy to fly forward off of the swing. Suzy, seeing the silliness of her mistake, laughed it off, and tried to get back up. She quickly realized that her leg had snapped in half. Suzy will never walk again.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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