What happened when the football player couldn't get his Coke from the vending machine? He got angry.

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Knock knock! Who's there? The police your son died in a car crash.

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What did the orphan boy get for Christmas? Cancer. What did he get for his birthday? He didn't make it that far...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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What did Little Johny get for Christmas?

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how did the man jump over the mountain? it was a small mountain and he had a trampoline

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Q: When there's something strange In your neighbourhood, Who you gonna call? A: The Local Authorities!

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There are two eggs sitting in a carton in the refrigerator. The first egg says, "Sure is cold in here, eh?" The second egg replies, "Holy crap! A talking egg!"

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What do an elephant and a grape have in common? They're both purple... except for the elephant.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am a cow moo

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Society wants to be so prude and pure that on AntiJoke, you actually get words like P U S S Y and P E N I S censored !

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Q: Why did Suzie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock-knock? Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Why did the man crossed the busy road? Because he was sick of life.

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the firefighter says to the other firefighter: hey firefighter, are we going to fight a fire?

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A guy with a severe attention deficit walks into a bar and... oh, look, the sky is pretty... wait, what was I saying ?

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What did the doctor say to the pregnant mother? Your babies dead

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Then help me understand Nero, people had the free and legal right to decide to be a part of our, or your society if you prefer, where has that option gone now? Where is the people that choose to believe in their own potential and in the one of their equals? Today we live in a society where its basically pop culture to dislike oneself, where it is considered narcissism to like oneself, and you know that we have both been affected, while those we considered allies before, have joined the same people that branded us evil.

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2 guys walk into a bar the first gys says id like a beer the second guy says me to

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What happens to an elephant when it rains? It gets wet.

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Your mother is so white that when she dances, she is off beat a little bit.

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Friends are a lot like trees. If you hit them multiple times with an axe, they will fall down.

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What has two legs and bleeds alot? Half a cat!

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How do you throw a party in space? You planet!

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Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Um no horses are overrated.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops