Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

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Wanna hear a Harry Potter joke? Knock Knock Who's there? You know You know who?

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minorities

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Did you hear about the fetus who met a clothes hanger? I doubt very much that you did.

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where did the black person go poop ? in the toilet!

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Jingle bells, jingle bells, Jingle all the way Oh what fun it is to ride in a poop poop fart turd fart, dildo

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how do you make a janeter cry, you shit on the floor

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Man 1: youre going to die Man 2: why? Man 1: everyone dies

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2+2= 478

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a fat girl walks into McDonalds....

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How do you occupy a blonde for a day ? You put her in a round room and tell her to sit in a corner. ... That or you strap a bomb to her, give her a list of twelve billion things to do, and tell her the bomb will explode if she doesn't do everything on the list.

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Your mother is so fat.

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i came... i saw... -myself when i came.

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What makes the antijokes on this site funny? Nothing.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Get in the van, or I'll kill you.

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why doesnt cornelia say anything? she didnt answer

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why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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What do you get when you cross a rhino and an elephant? Two angry pachyderms.

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What do you give an obese person with diabetes? Insulin.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the postman, I have a package you need to sign for.

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Q: What do African Americans and Doorknobs have in common? A: Before the Emancipation Proclamation was passed, neither was free. Doorknobs still aren't free.

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Q)whats pink and fluffy A)pink fluff

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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