Miami Heat.

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Theres 3 guys walking and the see a genie. He says hell grant 3 wishes. The first guy asked for sandals. The genie said"I can do that" and he got sandals. The second guy asked for rock hard abs.The genie said,"sure thing".When he looked down, he saw that he had rock hard abs. The third guy asked for a pair of pants."ok" Said the genie. And then he got a pair of pants.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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Were do you find a dog with no legs ? Were you left him

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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Why did the pilot crash the plane? It was a tomato.

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i have cancer

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't.

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Q:why did the chicken cross the road. A:to get back to the farm he was raised on

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roses are read violets are blue u suck and ur gay

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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What's worse than pushing a baby off a cliff?........ Standing at the bottom with a pitchfork....!

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FUTURE-CHEESE!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

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Where did all the time go? In a recent study, 100% of all time, all systems go.

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Q: Who's driving? A: The cops

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I saw a kid watching Harry Potter so I asked him "Do you like Harry Potter?" he replued "yeah" so I asked "do you want to be Harry Potter" he said "yeah"... ...so I killed his parents and locked him in a cupboard.

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Why did the little girl jump off a cliff? because she was at a cliff jump at a water park

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You're really messed up right now... elephants don't talk

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Q. What's large, solid, and full of veins? A. A man or woman who frequently engages in weightlifting and follows a diet primarily based around high protein and low carbohydrate intake

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One day a girl comes home crying to her father. Father, Father! She says, a boy i met touched my shoulder! Like this? Her father says and touches her shoulder. Yes just like that, a bad part was that he kissed me on my lips! Like this? her father says and kisses her on the lips. Yes just like that but the WORST thing was he stuck his you know what into my you know where. Like this? Her father says as he sticks his you know what into her you know where. Yes just like that father but he had AIDS! ......( Awkward silence)..... oh shit.

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extraction interveal means the opposite of integer

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What did batman say to robin as he got out of the batmobile? robin, shut the door.

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What's the best way to eat 20 pancakes in ten minutes? With a fork

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Your eye color is very unique.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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