You dropped something.... Yo lip

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why did the boy drop his icecream?? he got hit by a bus

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What comes out of a zit? Purple poop.

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welcome to australia. *kangaroo kicks you in the gut and you keel over, whereupon you are stampeded by wild dingoes and eaten by tasmanian devils*

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Why did the bunny cross the road? Because it waited until a car was driving by and then got run over.

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I like my babies how I like my chips. Chopped up and in a bag.

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How do you get a girls number? Grow some balls and ask for it.

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Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she cant use it, she is fat.

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Why didnt Timmy Go to school? He Died.

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Why did Princess Diana cross the road? She wasn't wearing a seat belt.

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What do a purple grape and an elephant have in common? They are both purple, except for the elephant.

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Mail Man: *Knocks on door* Guy & Girl: WHAT?! *laughing* Mail Man: Mail! Guy & Girl: Hold on she is almost done with the whip cream.

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What's funnier than a jalapeño? A jalapeño on a stick.

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Why did Jim go to the hospital? To get an autopsy.

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Why does no one like fat people? Because of Jesse Ziegenbein

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Christmas presents.

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Do you know what a zombie smells like? Death

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A fat black guy walks into a pet store and asks if he can have a chicken. The cashier says "what do you want a chicken for?" He says " I need to lose weight so I'm hoping to eat its all natural eggs" So the cashier gives him the chicken and the fat black guy lost 50 pounds.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Murder his family.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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knock knock There's no door

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Person1: Have you heard about the girraffe who doesn't eat Georgia peaches? Person2: yes. Person1: Oh, never mind then.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops