Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

Where did all the time go? In a recent study, 100% of all time, all systems go.

What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

A black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Q: Who's driving? A: The cops

Why did the little girl jump off a cliff? because she was at a cliff jump at a water park

Q: why did the boy fall off his bike? A: he wasn't very coordinated

A murder, a cheater, and a liar walk into a bar..... Woah the aptriots must be in town -Rocco Tufano

What's a pirate's favorite letter? R, but they are also fond of the C.

When did the Chinese guy go to the dentist? At the correct time he had been allotted.

What is both dead and alive at the same? nothing, thats scientifically impossible you fool

In Soviet Russia, the government kills with famine and genocide.

A jew, a catholic, and a muslim walk into a bar. Within minutes, they begin to argue about religion. After a few hours of intense debate, all three left dissatisfied and upset.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

My friend came out.....of the bathroom so I could shit

How do you occupy a blonde for a day ? You put her in a round room and tell her to sit in a corner. ... That or you strap a bomb to her, give her a list of twelve billion things to do, and tell her the bomb will explode if she doesn't do everything on the list.

A couple arrived at Hospital in less than 3 hours. but actually they wanted to go to the Church...and 3 hours is quite a long time...

A rabbi, a nun, and a homosexual walk into a bar. They proceed to get drunk, and party like its 1972. Oh yeah. And your dad was just killed by a refrigerator.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She's a women.

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What do you get if you put a black man in the blender and then in the microwave ? ... I don't know, that's why I'm asking.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

if i'm white and you're white, then who took my car keys?

Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody. You'reschizophrenic and are hearing things. Go see a doctor. Now.

Why did the plane crash into the mountain? Because it was being piloted by a loaf of bread.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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