Q: What did the one legged homeless person get for christmass? A: Frostbite.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

What's brown and says "Hey, I'm a dog"? A talking dog, able to grasp the English language.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because they're humans and many humans enjoy the savory taste of fried chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

There are two muffins sitting in an oven. One says "boy it sure is hot in here." The other says,"yeah like 350-375"

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Wanna hear a Harry Potter joke? Knock Knock Who's there? You know You know who?

thumb_up thumb_down +47

a: How can you tell you are not pregnant? b: I don’t know. a: Like this: I’m not pregnant.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

knock knock. I have a doorbell, you don't have to knock.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Knock Knock. Peep Hole!!

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Christians

thumb_up thumb_down +33

what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A jew, a black man, a muslim, an atheist, a christian, a catholic, a roman, a russian, a cuban, an english man, a horse, a cow boy, a gay, a lesbian, a dancer, a teacher, a father, a mayor, a politician and a fish are in a bar. Now that's one crowded bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

how do you wake up lady gaga poke her face

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A Squirrel jumps into a bar, lands on one of the empty tables and begins eating the Peanuts out of a bowl. The bartender thinks to himself "I really should close that window to keep the Squirrels out..."

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the Booger cross the road? because He was getting picked on....

thumb_up thumb_down +23

BUT HWY?

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you call a man with three testicles? Polyorchid. Look it up.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What looks like dirt, smells like dirt, but isn't dirt? Fake dirt!!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

96

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's the difference between a red cube and a green cube? Nothing, I'm color blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

'I had a surprise test today.' 'What happened?' 'I was really surprised.'

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Reduce, reuse, recycle Anti-joke.com

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you get if you put a black man in the blender and then in the microwave ? ... I don't know, that's why I'm asking.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

The night is always darkest just before the dawn. Just kidding I'm Helen Keller, everything's always dark.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why did the chicken cross the road? to vote off obama

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops