Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf. That would be irresponsible/

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why doesnt cornelia say anything? she didnt answer

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What do you give an obese person with diabetes? Insulin.

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A mogwai walks into a bar. The bartender says "Sorry, we don't feed mogwais after midnight."

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Why does bobby have no friends? He's dead.

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Q)whats pink and fluffy A)pink fluff

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Whats round, hard, and full of seaman? Well in the context I'm using it in, a submarine, but too the inappropriate mind when spoken out loud, could be registered as the homophone of seaman, semen, which would then lead you too think of male genitalia.

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A black guy gets arrested...

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Yo mama's so fat, she possesses a Body Mass Index that is above the recommended value for healthy individuals and thus will have a greater risk for heart disease and other related health problems.

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Your mommas so poor she can't afford food for her child. Thats you.

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roses are read violets are blue u suck and ur gay

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing. He was Jewish.

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So its 1945, and these two blonds walk into a bar....I forget the rest of the joke, but Japan ends up getting nuked.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was tomato...

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How do you fit three gay men on a stool? You don't, that would be very uncomfortable.

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Nice legs....What time do they open?

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One day a girl comes home crying to her father. Father, Father! She says, a boy i met touched my shoulder! Like this? Her father says and touches her shoulder. Yes just like that, a bad part was that he kissed me on my lips! Like this? her father says and kisses her on the lips. Yes just like that but the WORST thing was he stuck his you know what into my you know where. Like this? Her father says as he sticks his you know what into her you know where. Yes just like that father but he had AIDS! ......( Awkward silence)..... oh shit.

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Why did the baby die? It got shot.

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What did batman say to robin as he got out of the batmobile? robin, shut the door.

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Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because they're humans and many humans enjoy the savory taste of fried chicken.

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A traveling salesman came into town and needed a place to stay for the night. A farmer told him that he could sleep at his house, where he introduced the salesman to his young, sexy daughter. "Why hello," said the salesman. It's very nice to meet you." And then he went to sleep in the bedroom that the farmer had prepared for him.

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minorities

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Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and an avacado? Michael Jackson molested a 12 year old boy

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Your mother is so stupid that it would be politically incorrect and socially unacceptable to make asinine, derogatory comments about her challenges.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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