Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a fridge halfway through walking.

A man jumped off a bridge. He went bungee jumping with his family and had a great time.

A dog got into a gingerbread house. She ate some and brought some to the basement it got on the couch!

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

What's even funnier than 24? A clown in a tree.

Your momma so poor, she has a hard time paying her bills.

Hey, guess what. What? ... Hello? Sorry, I don't talk to strangers.

A Frenchman, an Irishman, and a Russian walk into a bar. The Frenchman orders a glass of wine, the Irishman orders a whisky, and the Russian, who prefers to be sober, orders a glass of water. They have an all-around pleasant night, yet they leave the bar upset. Why? A severe water contamination in the town resulted in the Russian man consuming a fatal dose of arsenic.

Why couldn't the child go to the park? He was a registered sex offender.

how do you make a little boy cry? Kill his parents in front of him .

The snake rides the bicycle in the forest, the rabbit sees this, and says "hey snake, you don't have legs" "oh damn" replies the snake and eats the rabbit because of the insolence

There is a famous joke, "What's black and white and re(a)d all over? A newspaper!" However, this is not featured on this website. Why? Because this is anti-joke.com, not joke.com - you moron

Where did Suzie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

Roses are red Violets are blue This is an antijoke It doesn't have to rhyme.

How did the Jew survive the Holocaust? Trick question he didn't

Why did Isaac run from his mother? She tried to kill him because God said so. Christianity.

Q: what do you call the green and the (stone eater) animal? A:the green and the (stone eater) animal

She loves me, she dosn't love me, she loves me, the girl walks up to the man and says, she doesn't love me

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

what was postman pat's name before he was a postman? Pat.

Q: Why did the man die of starvation??? A: He didn't eat for 3 days!!

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a car? I don't have a car in my garage.

Q:Why are babies and spaghetti alike? A:They both stick to the wall when cooked.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I've got a shotgun, Give me the money.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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