What's worse than eating a baby? Eating two babies filled with maggots.

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slaughter the mussies #EDL

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows, it's impossible to determine the motivations of an animal that is incapable of speech.

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CAVE JOHNSON.

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What do you call a low-fat banana? A nothing...

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What comes out of a zit? Purple poop.

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta pudding god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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Roses are cars, violets are rude, this poem makes no sense, neither do you

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You're a big fat monkey.

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What do you call a 5000 pound gorilla? Obese - gorillas should weigh around 400 pounds.

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Why was Katy Perry naked with your mom? Because they were having sex

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A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

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If life hands you lemons you're probably hallucinating

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Three blind mice. See how they run. Into things.

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A woman walks into the kitchen to see her husband cooking dinner because gender stereotypes have been dead for years.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? Because ever since 3 died, 7 had changed. He had turned aggressive and randomly snapped and hit out at some of the other numbers for no apparent reason.

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I have two coins in my hand that add up to 30 cents, and one of them is not a nickel. I accidentally dropped them.

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What did the Japanese man do to the pizza? He ate it.

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His face was drawn, but the curtains were real.

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What do you call a lord of the rings poster with nothing on it? A piece of paper

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What is your bill about? Clinton

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Q: Why was the teacher sad? A: Because she got fired

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What do you get when you cross a rhino and a whale? Comment your answer:

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Girls Lacrosse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops