My friend was in court for stealling smoothies so i told him to plead innocent and received 10 years in a federal prison and a fine of up too £5000 pounds

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Q:How can you tell an asian has just robbed your home? A: You took the necessary precautions to purchase a very high quality security system and you caught the whole thing on tape, and the man was arrested.

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How did the black guy survive the bus crash? At the time of the bus crash, it was a segregated community, therefore no black people were allowed on buses.

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Why did the car slow down? Becuase the driver pressed the break

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How do you learn how to drive? You get in the driver seat

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What happens when your read this? you don't laugh

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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Why was the girl crying? She got shot in the penis

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Knock Knock. Who's There? I have cancer.

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a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

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Why did the Taxi crash? The cab driver was trying to remove the frog stapled to his face.

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What do you call a shoe with no laces? Stilettos, sandals, flip flops, slippers, etc...

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Who kills babies? A baby killer? No. I do.

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing???? she had down syndrome

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How do you get clean dishes? You wash them.

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A man walked into a bar. He got drunk and left.

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Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

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Roses are blue, Violets are red, Wait, what? huh

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WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

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What do you do with a dog that has no legs? Take him to the vet and have him put to sleep, it's the only humane thing to do.

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If you'd turn to page 43 you will find the homework. Have a good weekend!

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If you have a stroke, call 000

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who sells coke and ruins lives? Vagina Parker

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ROSES ARE RED VILOTS ARE BLUE I HOPE YOU KNOW IM A JEW

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops