What did the elephant say to the pelican? He didn't say anything. I lied.

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What did the Jew say to the Catholic? Nothing. He is a mute you insensitive moron!

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rose are red violets should be purple

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I forgot to tell you something I forgot wat it was

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How did the girl cross the road? --she didn't, she died trying because she was blind and didn't see the sign that said "Don't Walk"

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I have a gun BANG!

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So a man walks into a bar and gets a drink, then a man walks up to him and tries to start a fight, the first man says, "No thanks" and walks home.

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why is six afraid of seven? because six is a rapist

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Whats the difference between a black guy and a bench? Ones a person and the others a bench.

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Get some flipping new jokes people

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-knock knock -i'm not at home, go away!

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chinga tue madre Ryan

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trump and hillary are both stranded on an island, who survives? america

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You know what makes me sick? Bacteria

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why is everyone always picking on ruth? because they just do

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A dog walks into the local newspaper to place an ad. The dog writes; "woof woof, woof woof woof." Receptionist: You know you can ad another two woofs for the same price? Dog: Well that wouldn't make any sense at all?

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roses are red violets are blue kyle brown and pj nosaki have big balls

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How do you stop a bus? You don't, and Regina George didn't either.

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a man walked into a bar.the bar was metal and he cracked his skull

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how do you wake up lady gaga? set her alarm for a reasonable hour

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Ol-ive

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why did the boy drop the ball. he was shot in the head.

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

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So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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