- Knock Knock!! - whos there? - KGB - KGB wh........... *slap* - vwe vwill ask the questions!!!!!!! - Knock Knock!! - whos there? - KGB - Mom the KGB is here again....... - i dont care just answer the damn door - 5 seconds later nobody answers the door....... u here a crash and all of a sudden big men run in with guns - one comes over and slaps the mother while he continues to say " the KGB vwill vwait for no one!!!!!" - every body in the house is shot and and the KGB goees on to tlive normal lives........ for the KGB

What is worse than finding a real joke on Anti-joke.com? Starving children in Africa.

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? Quite obviously, still quizzical, being that tests are just longer, harder quizzes.

why cant little timmy ski? he was born without legs.

Why did the chicken cross the street? K

Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

Did you hear what happened to the blonde ice hockey team? They drowned in spring training.

Gorillas are black, Roses are red, Were out of milk, GET THE F**K OUT!

Q: What did the air freshener say to the car??? A: Nothing. Air fresheners are inanimate objects

How do you stay out of Heaven? you stay alive.

Why did the kid throw a clock out the window? The kid was probably having a temper tantrum and it was an expression of frustration.

what did the white man call a black man that was awarded the job he applied for? He stated the man was a hard worker and deserved the job. Then he walked up to the man with a smile and congraduated him. Then he went home and commited suicide after he concluded he didnt deserve to live.

Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting yours asshole clawed by a grizzly

So a blonde walks into a wall...

A man in a state penitentiary drops his soap. He then picks it up and continues his shower.

What do humans and trees have in common? -If you hit them with an ax multiple times, they fal down

What sucks more than being married? Being shot in both kneecaps

Why can't Hellen Keller watch Spongebob? She doesn't have the proper cable service

Why couldn't the Chinese women see... It's because she just got into a terrible car accident and suffered a rental detachment in both eyes. Follow up question, why was the Chinese women even allowed to drive?

A blonde was very smart, and nobody made fun of her when she sometimes made small mistakes like every other person regardless of hair color.

Why was the plumber sad? Because his family died in a car crash

Which came first? The chicken? Or the egg? Whichever one was more sexually excited i guess.

Q: How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? A: That's not funny.

Great ideas: Go to your facebook account and type in: Man, I am gonna suicide right now, bye! Moral: Now if you do it as well, nah, dont do it, seriously... Just type it!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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