How did the guy feel after his wife died? Pretty shitty, I'd imagine..

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How can you tell if your roomate is gay? If he gets an erection when you have anal sex with him.

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Why are some people so good at basketball? Because they are all black.

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How do you stop a baby from crying? Douse it in gas and throw it in a fire

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Q: How do you know if you have had too much to drink? A: When you find a bloody hole where your kidney is.

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What do you call a blue and black dot on the wall? A fly wearing blue jeans.

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I put the STD in stud now all i need is U

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Whats worse than losing your entire family in a car accident? Luikimia

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Q: why did the 10 year old squirt his dad with the water hose? A: what 10 year old WOULDN'T?

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Justin Beiber

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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why did the man take a poo because his rectum exploded

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Q. What is the difference between a bird and a fly? A. A bird can fly, but a fly can't.

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Ask me if I'm a human. Are you a human? Yes.

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why did the Cow die....? He didnt!!!!

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In Soviet Russia, everything you do will have an equal and opposite effect, for the laws of physics still apply in every part of the world. No matter where you are.

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A man walked into a bar. He has been in a coma for six weeks now.

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why was the man so good at holding stuff? he was born with 4 arms!

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Yo mama so fat when she went to the ocean the whales started to sing we are family even though your fatter than me

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Friends are like snow; they disappear when you pee on them.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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why did the doctor go to jail? he was found guilty of the murder and rape of a 6 year old boy.

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A duck walks into a bar. The large African American male at table three punches the smaller Asian man at the bar because of a long standing and unfulfilled monetary debt. The Asian man procedes to pull out a concealed knife and repeatedly stab his assailant until he is dead. The duck orders several rounds of whiskey due to the fact that it has recently been fired from its job. Later that night, it took its own life.

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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth? Stuck

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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