Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

What did the boy get from his grandmother on Christmas. Nothing she died on Thanksgiving.

friends are like onions when you chop them up you cry but when you throw them out of a window, you dont

Q. What is a deaf man's favorite song? A. Nothing, because he can not hear.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

What do you give a man who has everything? Syphilis

Adam eats ginger nuts the fookin chicken

What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja

a man walked into a bar. the bartender asked why he was annoyed. he answered " people keep on telling this joke and I'm tired of the making me get drunk

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? This year I'm going to win the golden brief case!

Whats worse than the holocaust? Anal.

Everyone is equal. It doesn't matter if you're black, red, yellow, brown, or normal.

Q: What do the Terms of Service say? A: I dont know, I didnt read them.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

Every 5 seconds a child dies in Somalia. Good news is there are 4 second intervals when a child isn't dying in Somalia. I say kill them all

Justin Bieber hits puberty

How do you run faster than a cheetah? Cut off its legs.

Jesus hates you this I know, because Buddha told me soo.

A blonde takes a math test it says find x? She circles x and puts there it is!

What did the girl say before she jumped a bridge? "Do you think I can jump off this bridge?"

Hey i just met you and this is crazy, but heres my gamertag so party up maybe?

p lkl

A horse shits himself SHITLESS!

What do you do when a black person steals your computer Inform the authorities, as theft is a felony.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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