Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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Once upon a time a girl took a gun and shot herself in the face

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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hi

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what did batman Say to robin before they got into the car? get in the car

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Q: What happened to Michael Jackson yesterday? A: Nothing.

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What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods They both have beards... EXCEPT FOR TIGER WOODS.

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A man walks into a bar and says: "ouch!"

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Whats the fastest way to a man's heart?? Saw through his breastplate.

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A hayride would be fun.

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why do women have small feet. so they can stand closer to the sink

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a: How can you tell you are not pregnant? b: I don’t know. a: Like this: I’m not pregnant.

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A man walks into a bar... But, it's not funny because he's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

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what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names.

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Chikin nuggets

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3 jews are walking into a bar. the first jew orders a shot of vodka, drinks it and says "long live my family!" the second jew orders a shot of whiskey, drinks it and says "long live my friends" the third jew orders water, because he is the one that is driving tonight.

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What's funner than a barrel of monkeys ? Not the Holocaust .

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How many dead babies would it take to plug the Fukushima Dai-Ichi nuclear power plant? None -- they are using thousands of litres of liquid glass coagulant instead.

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You might be redneck if you are... Indian

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'I had a surprise test today.' 'What happened?' 'I was really surprised.'

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What's the difference between black people and white people? Their skin color.

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Ran into my ex last night, so I put my truck in reverse and did it again.

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u smell oh no of wat?? dunno i just know its BADDDDDDD !!!!!! k.c

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Nero, man, I mean I will hurt you, I am on my way to the hospital, and seriously that pic does not look real, seriously on a hospital? I mean man, I am really sorry! I nearly killed you, how was i supposed to know you do not care about your teeth and take half a bottle of that calcium stuff? My mom? Yeah sure! She laughed at the message you sent her, and if you touch my sis, ill kill you, anyway I am on my way, you better change your mind or I will kick your ass!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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