Your momma's so fat...

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Whats the fastest way to a man's heart?? Saw through his breastplate.

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Q: What did the one legged homeless person get for christmass? A: Frostbite.

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Why'd the cat have one eye? It got kicked by a goat.

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Why did the man push open the door? The sign said PUSH.

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why did the ginger start crying. because people through bricks at him!

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Why did the monkey fall out the tree? Because he was dead.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies "I have cancer"

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Whats funnier than a anti-joke? 911

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Your so ugly That when you look into a mirror it shows an accurate potrail of your unproportionit face

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what did the little girl do after drinking a smoothie? she choked and died a painful death.

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Did you hear the one about the priest, the rabbi, the astronaut, the olympic diver, the mcdonald's employee, and the web designer? Neither did I...

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody. You'reschizophrenic and are hearing things. Go see a doctor. Now.

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guess what the quarterback did he threw the ball!

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A black guy gets arrested...

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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What do you call a boy that fell off a ferry? Extremely unlucky, since one of the other passengers noticed and the captain turned the ferry around, threw him a ladder, and pulled him aboard. Also he died of hepatitis because his mother was too poor to afford condoms, so he was born with it.

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Why did the cockroach cross the road? Why do you ask?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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A: Knock knock B: "NOOOO" A: *Comes in, sees masturbating son*

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A young girl walks into a dark alley. She emerges a few minutes later unharmed and goes about her day.

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Why are atheists stupid? Actually, statistically, they are more intelligent than believers.

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your mom is so poor that now your family is at risk of losing there home

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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