Why didn't the man enter the bus driven by a black man ? It wasn't going where the man had to go.

Arrow to the Knee

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartenders says, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because horses do not comprehend English. He then becomes startled by his surroundings and bolts out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

What do you get when 100 sex-crazed gays are in the same room? About a quart.

clamidia

Think about this. I am lying to you right now.

a fat girl walks into McDonalds....

96

A man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender immediately tells him to leave as they don't allow pets.

What did Helen Keller say to her eye doctor? Nothing, she is incapable of speech.

A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

if a black man, a Chinese man, and an Indian were about to jump off the Eiffel tower, who would hit the ground first? who cares?

What do you call a brunette between two blondes? Susan.

your mama is so fat that she weighs 261 pounds.

Why did the pilot crash the plane? It was a tomato.

What's brown and sticky? Poop.

What’s green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

what do you call a gay kid? KIRK, SAV, FRANK, or even KIRKLE THE TURTLE

A man goes to the doctor complaining of pain. Everywhere I touch it hurts, he tells the doctor. "The cancer has spread," the doctor says. "Go home and spend your last days with your loved ones."

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have multiple personality disorder, NO YOU DON'T!

Why did the murderer buy a lizard? He thought that they were cute.

A young christian boy walks into a church and gets raped

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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