A mogwai walks into a bar. The bartender says "Sorry, we don't feed mogwais after midnight."

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The night is always darkest just before the dawn. Just kidding I'm Helen Keller, everything's always dark.

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Viciously beating your children with other recently beaten children.

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Yo mama so stupid she liked this joke

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What looks like poop and smells like cheese??

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Once there was two fish in a tank, and one said "how do you drive this thing?".

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Why did the chicken cross the road? there were no more cars in the way

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Want to hear a joke about Potassium? So do I.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? The chicken decided go get cigarettes and then hang out at a bar. The chicken sitts next to horse, the horse says "Why the sad face?" The chicken justs sitts there, thinking about the insanity that he has caused. "I don't know, is my joke not getting old?" Replied the chicken.

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What do you call a three legged man? Horribly deformed

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Womens rights

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Two muffins are in an oven. They are then baked at 375 for about 30 minutes and then taken out to cool.

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Lizards are like marshmellows. If you put them in the microwave they blow up.

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A man goes to the doctor complaining of pain. Everywhere I touch it hurts, he tells the doctor. "The cancer has spread," the doctor says. "Go home and spend your last days with your loved ones."

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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What's my name? I don't know u tell me.

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whats worse than getting beaten up by a bully? realizing your fly was down the whole time and getting beaten up by a bully

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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Once upon a time a girl took a gun and shot herself in the face

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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hi

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what did batman Say to robin before they got into the car? get in the car

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Q: What happened to Michael Jackson yesterday? A: Nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops