3 guys walk into a bar to tell an anti joke. The bartender asks them to leave.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Miami Heat.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's round and red? A round and red solid.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Theres 3 guys walking and the see a genie. He says hell grant 3 wishes. The first guy asked for sandals. The genie said"I can do that" and he got sandals. The second guy asked for rock hard abs.The genie said,"sure thing".When he looked down, he saw that he had rock hard abs. The third guy asked for a pair of pants."ok" Said the genie. And then he got a pair of pants.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How did the leukemia patient die? He was shot in the leg repeatedly until he died of blood loss.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are finally spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinical depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Whats the difference between a waffle and a pancake? One is made in a waffle iron. And the other is made on a pan.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

how to u kill a baby with no arms, throw it in a pool

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's bad for your teeth? A brick

thumb_up thumb_down -7

why couldn't hellen keller drive becasue she was a women

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How long does it take to cook a baby in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy jacking off.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q - Why did the boy die? A - He had AIDS because his father raped him.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Women are like puzzles. Because prior to 1920 neither had the right to vote. Puzzles still don't

thumb_up thumb_down -21

That's as gay as AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

How many squirrels does it take to change a light bulb? 10 because they're so darn stupid!

thumb_up thumb_down -35

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for chrismas? cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +112

What did batman say to robin as he got out of the batmobile? robin, shut the door.

thumb_up thumb_down +66

Q: Whats Faster than a bullet A: A Jew chasing coin

thumb_up thumb_down +60

When did the Chinese guy go to the dentist? At the correct time he had been allotted.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +54

What is both dead and alive at the same? nothing, thats scientifically impossible you fool

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops