Why did the murderer buy a lizard? He thought that they were cute.

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I like turtoes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To kiss my ass

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Will you marry me? I'm an atheist. ,.

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How many fairies does it take to screw in a light bulb? If you still believe in fairies, there's something wrong with you.

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How many stripes does a Zebra have? Doesn't matter millions of people died in the Holocaust

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Three men are on a plane*. (*Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

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Nice legs....What time do they open?

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What do you call a Muslim driving a plane? You don't drive a plane.

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Hey hey what did the bald man say to brian moccia? lOL!

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Why did the chicken walk into Mordor? It didn't. One does not simply walk into Mordor.

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What's the best way to eat 20 pancakes in ten minutes? With a fork

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equality for women

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Why was the orphan crying? Because his parents are dead.

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Rebecca Black's new album.

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How do you occupy a blonde for a day ? You put her in a round room and tell her to sit in a corner. ... That or you strap a bomb to her, give her a list of twelve billion things to do, and tell her the bomb will explode if she doesn't do everything on the list.

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why did the pile of rocks cross the road? they were stuffed down the chickens throat

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Whats skinny, round, tall, smells like a dead baby, hard, small, and fat? nothing

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? He had cancer.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Get in the van, or I'll kill you.

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How did the kid drop his ice cream cone? Ans. He got hit by a bus

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What's funner than a barrel of monkeys ? Not the Holocaust .

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Your momma's so fat that when she goes to the beach, she feels self-conscious in front of all the other beach-goers.

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Knock Knock! Come in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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