Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

What did the man do after a bad day at work? He went home and beat his wife

A man sees a hitchhiker on a road. The man crashes because he was not watching the road.

One day a girl comes home crying to her father. Father, Father! She says, a boy i met touched my shoulder! Like this? Her father says and touches her shoulder. Yes just like that, a bad part was that he kissed me on my lips! Like this? her father says and kisses her on the lips. Yes just like that but the WORST thing was he stuck his you know what into my you know where. Like this? Her father says as he sticks his you know what into her you know where. Yes just like that father but he had AIDS! ......( Awkward silence)..... oh shit.

MWAAHHHHHAHAHHAH

How Long is a Chinese name.

What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a cheetah? Don't do that, I'm pretty sure it's illegal for several reasons.

Whats yellow and shaped like a banana? Bananas

A jew, a catholic, and a muslim walk into a bar. Within minutes, they begin to argue about religion. After a few hours of intense debate, all three left dissatisfied and upset.

What did the homeless guy do when he found a quarter? He picked it up

Knock knock! Who's there? Atch! Okay.

A man and a talking elephant in a waist coat go to a party. The party is actually an intervention for the man because he's on drugs and is ruing his life. The elephant is not real.

What did the boy with no arms get for christmas? Prosthetic arms.

A mogwai walks into a bar. The bartender says "Sorry, we don't feed mogwais after midnight."

what is the biggest lie in the universe? -click to enter only if you are 18

What does a dyslexic person call God? Dog

how many Alzheimer's patients does it take ti screw in a lightbulb? to get to the other side

I was walking down the street one day when suddenly, a chicken crossed the road. Apparently it wanted to cross to the other side.

i have cancer

So much oil was spilled into the ocean that it is killing animals.

William came home from school and was very tired. He went to the kitchen and got a chocolate bar. Then he died.

roses are read violets are blue u suck and ur gay

What is the punchline of this joke? There isn't one.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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