What happened to the old lady with a hat? She fell down

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are you from tennesse? cuase you sure look like a f u c k e d up redneck

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What did the underprivileged girl get for Christmas? Nothing because Santa Claus is a media generated holiday icon and the real St. Nicolas has been deceased for almost 700 years.

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While i was driving, my son asked, 'Have you had an accident in the last 5 years Dad?' And I replied, 'You're almost four now son'.

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How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? 17

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A: Why are black people so good at sports? B: Practice and determination.

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So I was standing in line at the grocery store and this little old lady let me cut in front of her. It was neat.

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Q. Why didn't the man tell his girlfriend about his big lottery win? A. Because it was none of her business.

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Yo momma so fat she saw a yellow bus full of white kids and said, "STOP THAT TWINKIE!!"

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A white kid, a black kid, and an Asian kid all try out for the basketball team. Which one makes the team? All of them, because they are all very good.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was drunk.

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How are a black man and a banana similar? They are both intelligent human beings, except for the banana.

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whats the difference between blue and green? there different colours.

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what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

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What's harder than steel? Beating Tetris. What's harder than diamond? Beating Tetris...

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I'm typing this one handed... ... Because I'm an amputee.

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Friends are like lettuce; If you eat their head, they die

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what do you call a blind man who buys a caller i.d.? handicapped

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Why did Santa get stuck up a chimney? Because there was a family of possums living up there. They ripped his face off.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 was a pussy.

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2 loaves of bread were in a bar they did nothing as they are inanimate objects

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Why did the baby fall off the swing? It had no arms or legs. Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because I kicked her in the face.

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Q: What does a Jedi say when another Jedi farts? A: Who sabered the cheese?

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What do you do if there's a rabid elephant chasing behind you, a vicious jaguar to your right, a rearing horse to your left, and a bloodthirsty lion in front of you? Innoculate yourself with a rabies vaccine, prod the jaguar on the nose with a stick (they hate that and will probably flee as a result), speak softly and calmly to the horse and encourage the lion to go for the elephant instead of you. You will probably still die as a combined result of mauling and trampling, and it's unlikely that you'll have two rabies vaccines to hand by chance for such situations, but your chances of survival will be minimally improved.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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