How would I re-arrange the alphabet? I would place P in your butt...

Women. Can't live with them. Can't systemically murder them without compromising the reproductive integrity of the species.

what did the astronaut say to the rocket scientist? hi

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

When the boy cried wolf who heard him? Not Helen Keller

What did the man with a colostomy bag say after his home was destroyed in a fire? At least all my shit’s in one place.

When will pigs fly? When they grow horns

What's worse than public speaking? Public masterbation. *Spelled it wrong purposly to bypass the filter*

How much does a polar bear weigh? About 800 pounds

What is 1 + 1 equal to? 2, because if you have one orange and if you add another orange, you will have 2 oranges, therefore 1 plus 1 is 2.

What is really hard around Kim Kardashian? Diamonds.

I'd like to make a withdraw

Why did the hooker fall out of the tree? Because she was dead

What do you call a black man riding a bike? A hard worker, he saved up his money for weeks trying to buy a bicycle.

What is 33 + 1? Penis

The little girl asks her father "Daddy why is santa fat?" "you have to exist to lose weight" he answered

Q: Who was the best Jewish cook? A: Hitler.

How do Yankees fans cheer for their favorite sports team? Let's go Yankees!

Why did the boy eat his homework? Because he was hungry. The teacher would stupid to say it was a piece of cake

why did the tortoise cross the road? it does not matter, it got hit by a vehicle and died on impact.

why ya gotta be so rude? cause i can

Find x X + 2 = 5 ^ I found it

knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

Q:Do you know why Jesus would not be a good goalkeeper? A:Because he never played football

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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