Why did the man cut his hair? Cause he has cancer

How many blondes does it take to change a diaper? About a thousand

A man is in prison and one day his cellmate offers to help him escape. The cellmate tells the man to quickly hide under the covers on his bed and that he'll instruct him further once the security guard passes. The man is then raped. Savagely.

Why was the camel sad he wasnt, camels dont have feelings

why was the asian kid the only one to get an A+ in the test? He spent the longest time studying and was therefore better prepared than the other students.

hello what is this crazy nonsense site sl

There was a Jewish man and a German man why was it akward? Because one of them farted

An anteatter walks into a bar, the bar tender says "hey renee zellweger"

What did the fat kid get for chirstmas? diabetes

Alex Gedrose.

what is behind your butt? DEEZ NUTS

Why did Rudolph poop while flying over Chicago? Actually, he had to go since trip started, and that's just where it happened to land.

What do you call a baby with no arms or legs? You call a lawyer, and be sure to have him ask the mother if she took Thalidomide during pregnancy.

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE I LIKE TITS TITS

Help, this is an urgent message from the S.S. Obesity. We're sinking; I can't imagine why.

Try this on some random person on the street... You: "Excuse me sir, do you know how to get to Farnsworth Street?" Man: "Sorry, no" You: "OK, you go straight ahead, then turn left on the second street. Continue about 200 feet, then......"

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

A cheerio gets a job at McDonalds and after working for a while, he gets employee of the month and goes to the district ball. While there, he meets a female(frosted) cheerio whom he asks out. She refuses because she only dates frosted cheerios. So, the male goes back to work for the next year, and his boss is happy with his work, so he asks him if he would like anything. The cheerio says yes, i want to be frosted. The boss says ok, i'll make you frosted, so now that he's frosted, he goes back to the ball. He asks the same female cheerio out, she says yes this time. He then asks her if she wants something to drink, she says yes. She wants some milk. So the guy stands in line for about 15 minutes, when he gets to the front, there is no more milk left. So he asks her if she would like some tea. she says yes. So he goes and stands in line for another 15 minutes only to find out there is no more tea. So then he asks her if she would like some punch, shesays yes. So after an hour of searching, he finds out there is no punchline......

Why did you loose the basketball game? Because they scored more points than us.

Your adopted.....

what did the bot get for his birthday? .. men!

Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? Ten babies nailed to a tree. What's worse than ten babies nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

A criminal walks into a bar, and shoots the bartender and has his way with the waitress. Its his bar now.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...