- Anti Joke

Kid 1: Hey, guess what? Kid 2: Your MOM! HAHA! Kid 1:... My mother died two months ago from brain cancer after being shot in the head while fighting for our country in Iraq... Kid 2:.... um.. Your mom...?

Why did Timmy's face hurt? Because there was a frog stapled to it.

How do you kill a polar bear? Global Warming.

Whats green, has four legs, and falls out of a tree? A Pool Table. Use your imagination.

roses are red violets are blue i use refrigerators to keep my food cool

Why was the homeless man lying on the floor? Because he was dead

WWII veteran screamed! "You d@mn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

LeBron James hits a game winning three with time running out in the Finals.

Women are only good for two things... Being raped and being raped in the ass.

What do you call a duck who votes democrat? A duck

Why were accents created? So when people go to Texas they come back sounding like a D-Bag.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have cancer, How 'bout you?

What do 69 and carpets have in common ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????1?2?3?4?5?6?7?8?9?0?????????#???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????©®™????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? Nothing

Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profits evenly.

What did Santa say to his elf? Nothing. Santa isn't real. Elves aren't either for that matter.

Knock Knock. Who's There? Oh wait! i don't care!

wat does say to another bird....... chirp chirp

What did the pregnant teen get for Christmas? A miscarriage

Twelve men walk into a bar, and get stuck in the door because it's far too small for all of them to walk through at the same time.

You are walking down the street. You see 3 black people and you don't talk to them because they are complete strangers.

If George Washington was the first president, and Barack Obama is the latest, how old is my grandma?

How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

Knock Knock Jehovah's witnesses!

I literally died laughing

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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