what did the pregnant mexiCAN woMAN say while she was giving birth? A LOT of curse words

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How do you keep Helen Keller distracted? Find a stimulating device that blind and deaf people can operate correctly.

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Why did the window break? I threw a pig out it.

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A man who is down on his luck was told that when one door closes a window opens. So he jumped out.

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What did the blind man say to the deaf man? It doesn't matter because the deaf man couldn't hear him.

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Man 1: youre going to die Man 2: why? Man 1: everyone dies

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What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? I don't eat hot dogs. Thank you though.

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96

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a duck walks into a bar, sits down and asks for grapes. the bartender says, "no, we don't serve grapes." so the duck leaves. the next day the duck goes back to the bar, takes a seat. "got any grapes?" the bartender says, "i already told you we don't serve grapes here. if you come in here and ask for grapes one more time, i'm going to staple your beak to the wall!" the duck leaves. the next day, the duck returns, sits at the bar and asks, "got any staples?" the bartender replies, "no, but there's an Office Max next door where you might find some."

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Roses are gray, violets are gray, everything's gray, bitch im a dog.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody because a sponge is not a who, it is a what.

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roses are red violets are blue the stems are green they smell good

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Reduce, reuse, recycle Anti-joke.com

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Why was the Catholic priest incarcerated? 2 counts of child pornography and 3 counts of sexual abuse with a minor. Since he is now released, he's working as a janitor of an elementary school.

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What's round and red? A round and red solid.

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Q: Why'd the chicken cross the road? A: to get to the other side

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What did the genie say to the frog? Go home.

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What is the speed limit in front of Liberace's house? 40mph because that portion of the road is curved.

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Your mother is so fat that she wears xxxL clothing

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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Why did the motorcyclist die? I heard he was sat on by Chuck Norris.

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How many finger does a fat person have? I don't know you can never find there hands.

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What did Darth Vader say to Luke? I am your father.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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