Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't.

Lizards are like marshmellows. If you put them in the microwave they blow up.

So there were two palm trees on an island. The first palm tree says to the second, "Hey! What's up?" The second one replies, "Nothing much, just chilling." Except they were actually ice cubes.

so a baby seal walks into a club...

Q - Why did the boy die? A - He had AIDS because his father raped him.

what do you call a gay kid? KIRK, SAV, FRANK, or even KIRKLE THE TURTLE

Your mother is such a whore that she has consensual sex with a lot of people...

A man walks into a bar. "Excuse me sir," he asks, "may I have a beer?" "No," says the bartender.

A Jewish man joins the German Army. He serves with distinction during the First World War, receives several commendations for bravery, and is one of the 12 million people killed during the Holocaust.

Hello, nice to meet you.

A man sees a hitchhiker on a road. The man crashes because he was not watching the road.

I know a lady who is SOOO fat that when she steps into the ocean, she gets her toes wet!

There are two muffins sitting in an oven. One says "boy it sure is hot in here." The other says,"yeah like 350-375"

Q: How do you get a bunch of mexicans attention? A: Say excuse me, can I have your attention please?

Your mommas so fat that she has developed adult onset diabetes.

If a tree falls on a house and there's no one there to hear it....Why was there no woman in the kitchen?

A man walks into a bar... But, it's not funny because he's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

A girl walks into a bar. She unfortunately meets a man with a drinking problem. The man takes her home, strips her of her virginity and then beats her with a bat until she can no longer breathe. Her name was Laura Pratz.

What's sad about a house on fire?, it was my house.

Obama 2012

Roses are red Violets are blue I have to go to the bathroom...

What type of cheese is not your cheese? The cheese that belongs to another person.

"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Your mother." "Your mother who?" "Really?"

You might be redneck if you are... Indian

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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