How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They brutally whipped and tortured her.

Knock Knock Who's there? Donald Trump Donald Trump who? I already told you my full name. You're fired!

whats worse than losing your pet rock? having your dog run over buy a car.

What would be funny? Seeing justin beiber 's penis.

What happens if Pinocchio says "My nose is about to grow." Nothing, Pinocchio was a fictional character created by Walt Disney.

What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? An Irish wedding is the celabration of two people joining in matrimony, and an Irish funeral is a somber rememberence of a deceased person.

Q: How do you get a bunch of mexicans attention? A: Say excuse me, can I have your attention please?

3 jews are walking into a bar. the first jew orders a shot of vodka, drinks it and says "long live my family!" the second jew orders a shot of whiskey, drinks it and says "long live my friends" the third jew orders water, because he is the one that is driving tonight.

A man walks into a bar and the the llama next store sprouted wings and flew Then a potato says hi to a iPod but unfortunatly the iPod can't talk. Meanwhile hello kitty and ducks wage a nuclear war and the rise of ostriches Started. The a giant cucumber started falling of mt. Everest and killed many Flying platipuses were saved. Then aliens started invading and the world ended.

Why do Mexicans like to eat burritos? They are delicious.

A BABY seal walks into a club

A horse walks into a bar... Horses are not indigenous to China.

a duck walks into a bar, sits down and asks for grapes. the bartender says, "no, we don't serve grapes." so the duck leaves. the next day the duck goes back to the bar, takes a seat. "got any grapes?" the bartender says, "i already told you we don't serve grapes here. if you come in here and ask for grapes one more time, i'm going to staple your beak to the wall!" the duck leaves. the next day, the duck returns, sits at the bar and asks, "got any staples?" the bartender replies, "no, but there's an Office Max next door where you might find some."

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

Whats orange and has stripes? - a tiger

What do you call a brunette between two blondes? Susan.

Q: How did the blind girl on the tight rope die? A: She fell because she has Parkinsons

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't make for a very good accountant.

why did the chicken cross the road? to vote off obama

What does an elephant and a red soda have in common? Neither collects stamps.

Jesus wept.

What did it say in the end of the book? The End.

How do you fit 100 babies in a bucket? put them in a blender. How do you get them out? potato chips.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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