It's raining, it's pouring The old man is snoring He went to bed, he bumped his head Got a brain hemorrhage and died in his sleep.

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A guy walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!"

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Q. How many pancakes can fit in a dog house? A. 0. Penguins don't like icecream.

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he wanted to get to the other side.

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That joke was so funny that I fell off my dinosaur. Then afterwards had to be put in a rehabilitation center because I am schizophrenic and dinosaurs are extinct.

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What's sad about four black people in a Cadillac driving off a cliff? Jerome never wanted it to end like this. James, his best friend, was drunk... Again. That was just the way he was. He got wasted, did something stupid, apologized, and then did it again. But this time, there would be no next time. They were supposed to be going to their graduation party, but instead, James fell asleep at the wheel. The cliff was rapidly approaching, and the doors were locked. All Jerome could do now was pray. Also, the Cadillac costed a lot.

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A teenage boy walks into a bar, he doesn't even know he's slowly drinking his life away

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What did the penguins get for Christmas? A hang-glider What did the polar bears get for Christmas? Death, The Holocaust, Global Warming, and all of Steven King's books.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.

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Q: What do you call an aligator in a vest A: Investigator

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A fat man on a moped

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what did one caterpillar say to another caterpillar? let's be butterflies

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your a Jew, I don't like you.

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What happens when some one breaks apart your little brother's lego tower? You have a screaming little brother and a bunch of legos all over the floor.

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What rymes with milk..... milf

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? A warm meal thanks to a Charity organization.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? He said, "Where's my tractor?"

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What would be funny? Seeing justin beiber 's penis.

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Yo mama is so fat that her dietician often recommends that she decrease her calorie intake and exercise more often to avoid risk of diabetes or potentially a stroke.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Cheese.

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Inquiry: After the specially hired detective in shades of black had managed to finish his secret investigation of the crime scene, what significant affair did he demand and expect to subsequently occur next in the logical chain of events? Answer: A specific transaction of money. To elaborate, immediate providance of previously allotted recompense in the particular configuration of myriad pristine wads of cash.

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It's easy to take part, just type your text below!

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What's black and not working? An old, broken piano.

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What looks and sounds just like a seagull ? A seagull.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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