What did Tarzan say when he took out his knife? I took out my knife.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why coulden't the fish swim? He got poked in the eye with my nipple. My nipples get really big when I'm swimming in cold water.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

You.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's cheese that's not yours? Mine.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

thumb_up thumb_down -1

123457

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the black man perform well? Because he was a well trained musician by the name of Stevie Wonder.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

why were the little boy's clothes all wet? because they found his body in the bottom of a river.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call a black man without a job? Unemployed.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

There was a small boy with a lollipop and a spinning hat. He died of lieukemia.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How do you kill something thats already dead? You don't. It's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

what did batman Say to robin before they got into the car? get in the car

thumb_up thumb_down -23

panda bears are racist to mexicans-they are black, white and asian

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Q: What happened to Michael Jackson yesterday? A: Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

How do you get a plumber to cry? Kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down -81

What happens when some one breaks apart your little brother's lego tower? You have a screaming little brother and a bunch of legos all over the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down -107

A blind man walks into the door of a bar

thumb_up thumb_down -127

roses are red violets are blue you look like a monkey lets take you to the zoo if by chance you try to escape ill take my fist and smash your little monkey face! btw i made this up if you use it ill kick your nuts!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +106

Why did the white man accuse the black man of stealing his wallet? Because they were the only two men in the room at the time of the theft

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Why was the chicken mad? Because he was sick of everyone questioning him even when he crossed the road.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Your mommas so fat that she has developed adult onset diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because it's delicious.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What did the African boy get for his Christmas present for the first time? Leprosy

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Woah again Nero, you are so wise... I love you, I really do. If someone can and has already changed the world for the better, its you. No wonder people believe you have superhuman abilities, I used to think so too, but I think I understand what humans can do on another level now, you did that, thank you.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops