why did Timmy fall off the the slide? he was hit by a plane why was Jimmy laughing? he watched Timmy get hit by the plane

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What did the paraplegic boy get for christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish.

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A: Knock knock B: "NOOOO" A: *Comes in, sees masturbating son*

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How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get a ladder and carry him down.

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Hi

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I went to buy some camouflage shorst the other day but I couldn't find any.

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A guy walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!"

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What did the muffin say to the other muffin? "Hello, nice to meet you."

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he wanted to get to the other side.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because my first shot missed.

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What did the sphinx say to the Minotaur? Nothing, as they are fictional creatures and in according to probable science, don't not exist.

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To be honest that sounds like more of a mental health issue and not something I'm qualified to deal with as a GP. Let me refer you.

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what do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Bob

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(in a retarted voice) i want to go to disneyland

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What did the penguins get for Christmas? A hang-glider What did the polar bears get for Christmas? Death, The Holocaust, Global Warming, and all of Steven King's books.

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Why dont you ever see any black mermaids? Mermaids dont exist.

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Roses are red violets are blue ... Aww I just don't give a damn and nether do you.

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How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a Cadillac? A Cadillac is a car, and a dead baby is a morose and disgusting topic of internet humor.

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Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

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Your mommas so fat that she has developed adult onset diabetes.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Cheese.

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lebron

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Inquiry: After the specially hired detective in shades of black had managed to finish his secret investigation of the crime scene, what significant affair did he demand and expect to subsequently occur next in the logical chain of events? Answer: A specific transaction of money. To elaborate, immediate providance of previously allotted recompense in the particular configuration of myriad pristine wads of cash.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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