How many hispanics does it take to screw in a light bulb. One. Just one. You just screw it in, it's not that complicated.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do stuffed animals and living animals have in common? There both living except the stuffed animal.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's cheese that's not yours? Mine.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

It was the eve of December and a man was using a blanket why? because it was cold and he wanted to be able to function properly at work so his boss would not get mad at him because he respected his boss and wanted to make him happy

thumb_up thumb_down +2

a horse walks in to a bar and the bar tender asks, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because it is a horse and is confused by its surroundings and then gallops out of the bar knocking over a few tables as it makes its escape.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a fly with no wings? Joseph

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What happened to the Caucasian man who went to Vegas? He lost all his money so the government took away his car and his house so he had to become homeless and live on the streets begging for money from any who walked by until he slowly starved to death after eating food left in restaurants and trashcans.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

hrih

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you get if you cross a chicken and a potato? Answer- Chicken tasted potato

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A kid walks into a shop and asks the shopkeeper for a loaf of bread. The shopkeeper says, "White, wholemeal or multigrain?". The kid replies, "No thanks. My bike's outside".

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did the man mysteriously disappear? Because he was hiding without telling anyone that he was hiding.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Why was the boy sad? I don't know, ask him.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Runescape.

thumb_up thumb_down -88

A blind man walks into the door of a bar

thumb_up thumb_down -126

Whats the fastest way to a man's heart?? Saw through his breastplate.

thumb_up thumb_down +71

There are two muffins sitting in an oven. One says "boy it sure is hot in here." The other says,"yeah like 350-375"

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Knock knock. Who's there? You know. You know who? "Call him Voldemort.... Fear of a name increases fear of the thing itself."

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What is black and white and red all over? A zebra that has been shot, because poaching is quite common in many African savannas.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

knock knock. I have a doorbell, you don't have to knock.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A blond and a brunette took an IQ test. Both of them scored above average.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops