My dog has no nose." "How does it smell?" "Potato"

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What's the difference between a tube of toothpaste and Youtube? If you squeeze a tube of toothpaste then toothpaste comes out. You cannot squeeze Youtube because it is a popular video sharing website. Even if you could squeeze it, no toothpaste would come out..

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A fat man on a moped

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How do you make a man sit down? Hold him at gunpoint.

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A: Knock knock. B: Who's there? A: Banana! B: Not you again..(slams door)

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Have you heard of Helen Keller's dog? No. Neither has she

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Christians

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1134

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How did the fat man die? Someone who was mad at society shot him and many others in the head while at the workplace.

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-rick:hey wut happens wen i pull this pin -jerry:rick no!!!!! rick then starts to cry as he remembers the tragic accident that caused his friends death,which rick caused

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What is worse than finding a dead mouse in your loaf of bread? A lot of things since you were able to sue the bread company for tens of thousands of dollars.

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Welcome to Watchmojo dot com and today we'll be talking about the Top 10 numbers from 1 through 10. In this episode we will be discussing which numbers from 1 to 10 gain popularity and mainstream appeal amongst people from all over the world. Number 10. 10 (Ten) Number 9. 6 (Six) Number 8. 8 (Eight) Number 7. 4 (Four) Number 6. 5 (Five) Number 5. 3 (Three) Number 4. 2 (Two) Number 3. 9 (Nine) Number 2. 7 (Seven) Here are some honorable mentions: 3.14 9.9 1 and a half Number 1. 1 (One)

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Why was the thirteen year old raped by an online predator? Because he made very poor choices on giving out his personal information.

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A crazy priest squats down and poops in the middle of the church... nobody understood what was going so they pointed and laughed.

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What's the worst part about male roller blading? AIDS.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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What's my name? I don't know u tell me.

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Roses are Red. Violets are Blue. Grandma's dead. call the paramedics.

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot

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What do you do to someone you hate very much? You kill them.

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What do you call an Italian baby born with an extra toe? He was named Vincent Antonio Linguini and has been doing well with six toes.

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What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

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Jesus can walk on water. Babies are 75% water. I can walk on babies. I am... In jail.

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what's the difference between natives and dogs? people enjoy having dogs in their houses

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops