A horse walked into a bar, broke its leg and its owner then had to put it down because it was a racing horse and the owner did not have enough money to bring the horse back to health. Fuck you.

What happens when you turn back time? You get "emit."

What's the difference between a red cube and a green cube? Nothing, I'm color blind.

I went to see a fight and all of a sudden a hockey game broke out.

A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. Look at my new shoes.

What do you call a man with a sack of money running from a bank? A rich man.

It was the eve of December and a man was using a blanket why? because it was cold and he wanted to be able to function properly at work so his boss would not get mad at him because he respected his boss and wanted to make him happy

A: Knock knock B: "NOOOO" A: *Comes in, sees masturbating son*

So there were two palm trees on an island. The first palm tree says to the second, "Hey! What's up?" The second one replies, "Nothing much, just chilling." Except they were actually ice cubes.

What's yellow and dangerous? China.

acuna

What is the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A Mexican is a human being of Aztec descent, while a bench is an inanimate object used most frequently as a place to sit.

What did the orphan say to the other orphan? Annie is my favorite movie.

Roses are Red. Violets are Blue. Grandma's dead. call the paramedics.

A kid walks into a shop and asks the shopkeeper for a loaf of bread. The shopkeeper says, "White, wholemeal or multigrain?". The kid replies, "No thanks. My bike's outside".

Why doesnt Mexico have a navy? Because cardboard doesnt float.

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when god gives you lemons, you find a new god!

What's the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair

What rymes with milk..... milf

A black man, a Jewish man, and a gay man walk into a bar. They are all good friends who want to enjoy drinks together.

Knock knock. Who's there? You know. You know who? "Call him Voldemort.... Fear of a name increases fear of the thing itself."

Why did the police stopped the black driver? Because one of his car's lights was busted.

a: How can you tell you are not pregnant? b: I don’t know. a: Like this: I’m not pregnant.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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