what did the schizophrenic get for his birthday? new friends

What's a pirate's favorite letter? R, but they are also fond of the C.

What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? An Irish wedding is the celabration of two people joining in matrimony, and an Irish funeral is a somber rememberence of a deceased person.

Knock Knock. Ow! Why you hit me!?

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

Where do you find your quadriplegic dog? Right where you left it.

Itookasipasoda

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? He had cancer.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies "I have cancer"

What looks like dirt, smells like dirt, but isn't dirt? Fake dirt!!

what do you call a black man flying a plane? a pilot you racist.

why is billy g is really supid because he gets bad grades

What do Kenyans do at night? Starve.

What makes fat kids laugh? Jokes.

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What do you get if you put a black man in the blender and then in the microwave ? ... I don't know, that's why I'm asking.

Reduce, reuse, recycle Anti-joke.com

What looks like poop and smells like cheese??

why did the mexican cross the road to get to the other country

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

How does one propagate a humorous reaction from peers and associates while not utilizing such characteristics as whit, jocularity, substance or auspicious punch lines? That's what she said.

Whats the difference between a waffle and a pancake? One is made in a waffle iron. And the other is made on a pan.

How many finger does a fat person have? I don't know you can never find there hands.

Lizards are like marshmellows. If you put them in the microwave they blow up.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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